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Newspaper Archive of
Golden Valley News
Beach, North Dakota
July 31, 1941     Golden Valley News
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July 31, 1941
 
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G'OLDEN VALLEY NEWS "'" SI-- WINC Cl CLF-- 8968 IT'S the new frock young Ameri- • ca loves. You'll see it every- where this summer in washable prints. Calico, percale, gingham, broadcloth and chambray are ideal for it. The style glorifies fem- inin~th its low cut Top Clown Dan Rice (1822-1900), the most famous clown in the history of the American circus, was a friend of most of the celebrated men of his time, made and lost several for- tunes, ran for congress and was even considered as a presidential candidate, says Collier's. During the Civil war, he earned $1,000 a week, or twice as much as Abra- ham Lincoln. square neckline, full gaLhered bod- ice, tight girdle waistband, girl- ish puffed sleeves and billowy gathered skirt. Wear it with a choker necklace of bright colored beads[ Patlern No. 8968 is in sizes 12 to 2U, Size 14 requires 31~ yar~s 36-inch fabric witi~uut nap; 7~i yards tic rac to trim it as sketched. For this attrac;ive pattern, send your order to: Delicious cold--or "ust heat and eat Test of Civilization The true test of civilization is not the census, nor the size of SEWING CIRCLE PATTERN DEPT. Room 11Z4 311 W. Wacker Dr. Chicago Enclose 13 cents in coins for Pattern No ............... Size ........ Name ....... +....,,...,.,..,..., ...,o, Address .............................. Rabbits Bv LIEUT. B. S. BURKETT (SicClure Syndicate--WNU Service.) SAM THORP chuckled faintly when he slid from his saddle in front of the little post office and gen- eral store at Mecaha, Mont., about noon on an early autumn morning. He lifted his two jackrabbits out of reach of a lanky cat and sauntered to the rear of the building~ Otis Green, postmaster and deal- er in general merchandise as well as real estate sin~e the discovery of oil on the Musselshell, glanced up from the pile of mail he was sort- ing. He grunted a grudging, "Howdy, Phillips- THE PAPERS OF PRIVATE PURKEY Dear Ma: I got your letter about not yelling at anybody on no golf coarses andI please do not worry as 1 am always / a gentleman espeshully since that[ Tenersee division was maid to do a i 15 mile hike all over again for yell- ing you hoo at half dressed women and male golfers looking for lost balls. From now on I go strictly on the idea that anybody I see in open lots may be a general for all I know, Sam. Whatcha want to argue about Personally I wo;d :ot poke no fun today?" Thorp held up the two jackrabbits, at a general on a golf coarse any 8001HE9 CHAFE[} 9KIN "Two dern fat rabbits--been livin' how on account of I like to see them R(iLIIIE co the ol' lady's lettuce fer a couplathere. The farther a generalis from months. But I trapped 'era last the camp the less times I get In- WHITE PETROLEUM JELLY night," said Sam. "Need a leetle spected. This is a war of decep- coffee mighty bad." tion, ma, and where can a general Volume to Read ' "Couldn't sell the last ones I find more deception than on a golf Every man is .a volume, ff youbought from you, Sam. But I'll give I linx? It is also a war of movement land you don't know what move- know how to read him.---Channing, you twenty-five cents for 'era both.'" ments are until you see a middle- "Uhuh," grunted Sam. "But I jist heerd you paid the Lamb boys i aged duffer going into his golf swing. twenty-fi cents apiece fer their rab- • a • bits an' them haLf shot to pieces, Generals need exercise like any- body else but if he is seen walking too." on a highway he loses face. The "Best I kin do, Sam. Twenty-five only place he can be seen hiking or nothing'." five or ten miles a day without be- "Well, 'tain't fair. But have to ing disgraced is on a golf coarse so let you take 'era. Dern shame, too. I don't see no sense criticizing Gen- You sell us poor devils gumbo land eral Lear for being on one that day. at oil price. Won't. grow nuthin' but • • a rattlesnakes an' sage hens." The outfit I am with is very good "Best geologist in the country mannered and wood not yell at no says there's oil on the land. I ain't golfers in a ungentlemanly manner. supposed to have wells sunk to A couple of weeks ago we was pass- Total of Past ~v prove it, am I? Besides, a trade's aing a linx and Otto Bixby yelled at The present is the living Sum'Lx~7"g trade with me, Sam. When I git a duffer but he was so deep in a total of the whole past.--Carlyle. ~" stung I take it as my fault. Ain't trap he could hear no voices unless • '~ no use in you bellyachin' now." they were from China. There was ~,~. "Can't raise nuthin' but rabbits in the garden an' now you won't even buy 'era--leastwise, pay only half ei, what they's worth." "A deal's a deal. Ain't no bust- ness jedgment about you, Thorp. We HI live on suckers lak you owt heah in Montanner. Reckon you'd better go back to Kentuck what you come ~. from." IHOTEL DACOT : "Thet's what I'm calcerlatin' on. But I can't sell my land . . ." i Completely Renovated / ' pound of coffee, shuffled out to his little sorrel and clambered onto the GRAND FORKS, N. DAK. B ~:, saddle. He chuckled faintly as he clucked to the little horse. Source of Revenue ~ Sam had jus fi is ed the evening Economy is in itseLf a source ot - chores when Otis Green jerked his great revenue.---Seneca. .~:, antiquated automobile to a stop at the front gate. ' ' "Havin' some men fer breakfast ’( and need a couple more rabbits. ~ Got any? Can pay you 25 cents for ,,. ~, these. ' "Now let me see. Caught three , , this afternoon. Reckon I might as welt let you have two uv 'em. Nice meat, too. But they'll cost you 50 cents. See by the paper the price of rabbits is up a leetle." Otis spat in the dust, swore a blue i J the cities, nor the crops, but in the kind of men the country turn~ out.--Emerson. MELS! THE SMOKE OF SLOWER-BURNING CAMELS CONTAINS than the average of the 4 other largest- selling cigarettes tested--less than any of them--according to independent scientific tests of the , moke itself I SMOKE'~ THE TILING! THE CIGARET OF streak and grabbed up the rabbits. From the front seat, he tossed the money to Sam before ramming his foot on the accelerator. Early next morhing, Green and three companions appeared at Sam's cabin. "Air yo' wantin' more rabbits. Green?" chortled Thorp. "Nope. Bigger deal this time," beamed Otis. "I come to buy this one sixty of yours. Got some friends here as witnesses, so we can close the deal right now." I'll give you ten dollars an acre fer the whole one hundred an' sixty." "Didn't I give you $20 an acre be- fore I fenced 'er and made all im- provements?" Sam rasped vehe- mently. "Yap, but land ain't what it was during the war, Sam." "It'll take just three times what it cost to buy it back. Sixty dollars an acre and it's yours. Nary cent less." "Yore plum crazy, Sam," Green shouted in a squeaky voice. "You can have 'er for my price er let 'er go. Ain't carin' which." Green knew Thorp would not come down, so he gave him sixty dollars an acre, paying the purchase price in new shiny bills; Sam was afraid of checks. "We're leavin' fer Kentucky to- morrow, mammy," said Sam, as he folded the bills with precision. Green glanced at the other men and winked. "Fer once I got you, Sam. Lucky such a fish as you is leavin' this country. I saw oil stain on your shoes and overalls yesterday. So I came up last night and went over your place with my flashlight. 1 found oil bubblin' out at three places. 'Nuf oil here to supply the whole state for fifty years," said Green. "Good geologist, awright. Yuh found all three spots where there's oil, jist three of 'em." "How the hell you know how much oil's on your place? You ain't ne geologist," snorted Green. "Wal, Mr. Green, when I couldn't find thet oil you told me was on my land when you sold zt to me, I went over to the Cat Creek Oil Field, got five gallons of crude oil, and made jist three wells for spec'lation. You found all three uv 'era," came the level voice of the rabbit man. "But a deal's a deal," he went on, as he felt the dry oil stains on his overalls. "Shore ruins clothes to make'spec'- lative oil wells, but I reckon hit's worth the trouble." FHA Government Agency Helps You Buy a House V. 8. skilled lcs. Welding, good job training, IS A "home of your own" an un- SCHOOL, fulfilled dream? Then you will want to know more about the Fed- eral Housing Administration, one of the most important agencies FarmTir*a, created by the national govern- ertruck. ~$ ment in the past few years. 3Vz', 32x4~" vln Nertltr~ Loans insured by the FHA have helped thousands of families--- many making under $2,000 a year Frau --to buy their own homes. Other ForemoS government agencies might also who have be of interest to you. fast indei~ Our ~-page booklet fully describes how themselves you can make use of these government ah Jacobs c agencies, also government-sponsored era- In 1869, aft ployment and education opportunities, had sworn i Gives facts on Selective Service. Send her lips for: your order to: the girl W~ veillance starvation quently, ] were corn to prison. We shall generally fi t t e triangular person has got into the a few women players in shorts and square hole, the oblong into the at first I thought they was fugitives triangular, and a square person The ' has squeezed himself into the money from ladies day in a turkish bath. We paid no attention to them, not round hole.--Sydney Smith. . Diane. even one yoo hoo and the ladies ~ __. seemed soarer than if we had paid ~ ~. some notiss to 'em. Women may get soar If soldiers yell at them but BI ! they mind it worse if they snub 'era. There was a very pompous looking man looking for a lost ball near the highway witch we marched on and one of the boys made some re- marks like "Looking for something, mister?" and "Did you try under iTC#/Nd #O~$E$#Og,f the bureau?" He did not think much of it then but ever since reading after dinner became a good about the General Lear incident he dmerican cestom back ~It t~e "~'~'• has been scared stiff for fear the man 18M century w~e# th/$ $~ort was a officer and got his descrip- #~kt/~placeofq#o/t$, tion. , • , EQUALLY ENJOYABLE before and Personally I think General Lear is after dinner ii the good Amer/can custom getting worse punishment than his of smoking mtld, fragrant King Edwards, troops and I bet he wishes he never America's fastest sell/ng cigar. For a cool, played golf in his life. I think peo- mellow ~moke, light up a King pie are rubbing it in. Dissipline is today. dissipline in a army and most of the boys here do not think a army should give Bronx cheers to nobody on the line of march and espeshully not to ladies no matter if they wear shorts or whoopskirts. This is a all out war but we should not be all out of manners. • 4 @ We don't even wave at nobody no more becuz for all we know it might turn out to be Secretary Stimson or Mrs. Roosevelt. The Lear thing maid the army awful careful. But I hope the people let up on General Lear becuz I hear he had plenty of excuse for being upset. I hear he was nine strokes on a par four hole and still 125 yards from the green when the soldiers you hooed. And not only that but he had gave his opponent a stroke a hole. Anything wood've made him soar. Well so much for that. I got the heavy sox in case I get to Iceland. Tell Irene Mahoney if I get to Ire- land I will look up her old man. Love, Oscar. • • Not much headway can be found in making the world fit to live in again until somebody invents a tank-proof treaty or develops a hog-proof man. Beautiful models have paraded in a style show before the draftees at Camp Upton. The idea is to show the soldiers what the well-dressed Iceland woman will not wear. 25-CENT SPECIAL There's one thing I can't do, I've found, No matter how I try. I cannot get my mouth around A sandwich three decks high. Merrill Chilcote. It • • We have seen the photos of Marshal Semyon Budenny of the Russian forces, and think this is the first time a panzer mustache has been used in the war. HERE'S HOPING ! When the Hitlers cease to hittle And the "Mussies" mus.s no more Then may humans sit and whittle With no further thoughts of war. • • It appears that Uncle Sam has decided to cease bundling with the Bunds. • a TRAFFIC NOTE Any tricks Are rather risky When you mix Your gas and whisky. Sensibility's Hands I with Sensibility would be a good por- 1 tress if she had but one hand; you better than not. He must were the "ARE AN INFLUENTIAL PERSON As a matter of hold the hands. He benefitbYl ment, b5 ?